My Mental Health Journey

The days pass on by as quick as an airplane flying by overhead. I try my best to slow them down, but once I do, it’s misery. The day aches and pains, eating away at my very own will. The silence slowly kills. The boredom empties my mind, and corrodes my productivity. My desire to work, or clean, or play completely evaporates. It leaves me dry and tired and unwilling to live. And so I distract myself, or pop a pill, or merely sleep the day away. And so they pass one by one until the year comes crashing to an end; suddenly, I awaken and send my gaze upward – only to realize I slept away another year. I tell myself, “This time around I’m going to live my life to the fullest. Do everything my heart desires. Travel and write and learn and support. Grow with compassion and love. Find that passion I’ve been searching for all my life”. And with an eager heart and vigor in my veins, I choose this year to be the year I’ve been waiting for. But as time passes, I regress to what I know so well. The distractions, and unhappiness. The negative habits and bland lifestyle until yet another year elapses. I wish to myself, to one day wake up and look at my life as one that I am living, not one that I continue to sit around and wait for. One day, I hope to find solace in the present moment and make my today my dream, rather than always dreaming and waiting for tomorrow, or next month, or year. And every time that airplane passes by above, I will remember that today will fly by in the blink of an eye, and before it does, I will live it as it deserves to be lived.