In group today, we talked a lot about our words and beliefs being so final and permanent and how daunting and hopeless that can make us feel.
“I’m not getting any better”
“I can’t cope with anything”
“My husband isn’t supporting me”
“I don’t find pleasure in things anymore”
These phrases have a tone – and feeling – of finality, much like our use of words like “always” and “never”. If we continue to tell ourselves these things and end these sentences with “I just don’t know what to do anymore” and “I just don’t know why this or that is or isn’t happening”, we are not allowing ourselves to see any possibility of change. We are taking all chances of hope out of the equation and are merely perpetuating the negative thought process and hopeless – or stuck – feelings of depression.
So… do me a big favor and try adding the word “yet” to the end of these thoughts and begin to train your logical brain (and yourself) that there is hope and that there is possibility for change in your life. Go ahead… Try it!
“I’m not getting any better, yet”
“I can’t cope with anything… yet”
“My husband isn’t supporting me, yet”
“I don’t find pleasure in things
“I just don’t know what to do
“I just don’t know why this or that is or isn’t happening, yet”
By simply adding this one word to the end of our thoughts, we simply open up the chance for change; the opportunity to explore and learn why we can or can’t do this or that, why we’re not getting better or don’t find pleasure in things and gives us some hope that we will once again (sometime in the near or far future) get better and will once again find pleasure in things. That YOU will, at some point, have the ability to cope again; to remind yourself that you are not actually stuck in this exact moment and feeling for the rest of your life… give yourself some honest and logical hope. And most importantly, remember that this depression, anxiety, hopelessness, defeat, and fear is not forever.